Belize

Corruption is as Corruption does – By: Aria Lightfoot

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“Corruption is worse than prostitution. The latter might endanger the morals of an individual, the former invariably endangers the morals of the entire country. “Karl Kraus

Am I the only person who is dumbfounded by our level of corruption and how open and acceptable it has become? The new political proposal seems to resonate a message of “Never mind that we are corrupted, the other party is even worse than us“ .The major political parties are shameless and pathetic in their nonchalant attitude towards corruption. Yesterday, I read where someone tried to justify the measurement of corruption based on a dollar amount. I have read citizens justifying their choice of party saying that “their party is not as corrupted, or better the devil you know, or lesser of two evils.”

It signals to me that the apathy and sickness of corruption has invaded every crevice of society, even the thinking of the average citizen. (whatever citizenship means these days) We are in desperate need of a cure. The parties in Belize have successful convinced the Belizean population that corruption is inevitable therefore accept it; additionally the parties have seemingly surrendered to this conclusion by not addressing the issue of corruption as a national crisis. Recently, polls have been suggesting or attempting to convince the Belizean population that Belizeans do not care about corruption. I am not convinced.

My hope is that Belizeans begin demanding accountability for the rape of their taxes at the pleasure of elected officials and the disgraceful undermining of our citizenship for votes. I may be inclined to believe that corruption must be legal right? It must be! It is openly discussed, and admitted by our politicians; they justify or exempt their behavior based on the corruption of the other party. The last two Prime Ministers of Belize are prominent attorneys and senior members of the Bar Association, so there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that corruption MUST be legal. As a citizen, my instinctive approach is to raise hell and demand laws to offset this blatant and discouraging behavior of our elected officials.

So I decided to take a trip through The Laws of Belize Criminal Code 101, to see if laws exist to offset this corruptive environment, before I clumsily climbed on my rostrum. I didn’t expect to see any anti corruption laws. I mean our parties are operating on the premise of less corrupted. Additionally, an international journalist correlated our corruption to poverty ( http://p.washingtontimes.com/news/2012/jan/16/tale-of-two-small-countries ). So if we all know corruption is the problem and it has become so ostentatious that even an international observer can see it and was compelled to write about it, I figured if I could advocate for strong laws, maybe it would deter our politicians and public officers from such contemptuous and scandalous behavior. Right?

I was stupefied and confused by the laws I found in our criminal code. Turns out that corruption is illegal in Belize and in some instances punishable by imprisonment of up to ten (10) years. Surely these major political parties don’t know this? But why wouldn’t they? They are dominated by prominent and senior attorneys of the Bar Association of Belize. They have been the Legislature for the past 30 years and they have in fact written these laws themselves. So now my anguish grows and my anger rises…not only are politicians blatantly corrupted, they have no regard for our laws in Belize. Winning elections and governing in Belize have become an official pillage on the tax payers money at the pleasure of the ruling party.

The Criminal code 101 of the Laws of Belize Section 139 (1) defines Theft as “ a person who by ANY deception [(can be defined as misleading, deceit, cheating, circumvention)] dishonestly appropriates property belonging to another [tax payers] with the intention of permanently depriving the other [tax payer] of it.” Theft does not mention the dollar amount, because a thief is a thief! If he steals one dollar he will surely steal a million dollars.

The Criminal Code which can be located at http://www.belizelaw.org/lawadmin/ also specifically targets corruption of public officers and also targets those who corrupts public officers and voters (see Sec 139-146, 155-158, 296-) . Take a personal tour, my Belizean people and see how many laws are broken by the voters, public officers, politicians and bar members in Belize. We are all partners in this moral, social and legal decline in Belize. Obviously calling on the Attorney General, Minister of Police, Commissioner of Police and Director of Public Prosecution to investigate and prosecute our politicians and government officials is a monumental waste of time, especially since they serve at the pleasure of the government of the day. So what happens when we have laws that are not enforced, rabid corruption and no political will to address it? Justice can never be achieved in a country that selectively enforces laws and the culture of lawlessness will continue to corrode our jewel until we say NO MORE!

 My mom use to tell me, corruption begins with the first act and with each act you begin to convince yourself that such behavior is acceptable and eventually you are so corrupted you can no longer identify it. The parents who allows their children to walk into their homes with items they didn’t purchase for that child is contributing to corruption. The public officer who accepts money for services the tax payer is paying for, is contributing to corruption, the voter who accepts money in exchange for votes is contributing to corruption. The politician who uses his office for pecuniary gain is contributing to corruption. The judiciary that discriminately distributes justice is contributing to corruption. The entire moral fabric of our country is deteriorating. The dollar amount does not make corruption Belize…Corruption is our deplorable deeds and our omission to address it and our attempt to justify it.

Daily Dingleberry 01-17-12

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So, last night the boards lit up like a krismus tree bc some blasted farinah wrote something about Belize and well, as usual, everybody get vex. BUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! It was hysterical y’all! Check it out for yourself: http://p.washingtontimes.com/news/2012/jan/16/tale-of-two-small-countries/#.TxTJaoyvbYY.facebook (You might have to right click and open it up in another page bc I noticed that this wordpress place doesn’t let the link automatically load)  I wanted to get involved in the debates and tell people to calm down but people were so busy being defensive, I decided to wait until the fracas dies down a little. I can’t believe that we got mad at this guy. He only said what we already bloody know! But I suspect the reaction came from a place of shame and denial. It’s fine to live like this if nobody else knows our secret, then we could pretend that everything ok. Typical OSTRICH going on there. I say, if it bothers you so much to see your name in black being painted red, do something about it. I’m glad the secret is out. You can’t do nothing about something you don’t admit. It’s like the 12 Step Program y’all. The first step is admitting you have a problem 🙂

Daily Dingleberry 01-16-12

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MLK Day. A man died for what he believed in. He had a clear vision. He had a clear direction. He knew the price he would pay and still, he would not be swayed, not by fear, not by intimidation, not even by the thought of the loss of his own life. It is insulting when his name is used to perpetrate lies and hate. It is insulting when we take the gift he gave us and spit on it. It is insulting when we use this day and his name to draw lines between black and white instead of what is wrong and what is right. Martin Luther King was an African American. He fought for the rights of other African Americans, yes. But Martin Luther King was bigger than that. He fought for human rights. He loved all his brothers and sisters. His own people didn’t agree with him about that, but he was insistent that as long as we all were not free, then none of us is free. So, show some respect for his sacrifice. Show respect for his vision. Don’t pick and choose pieces of his life, his message, to serve your less than honourable purpose. If you ain’t fuh all, you ain’t fuh none and you ain’t fuh Martin. Peace, brothers n sistahs.

Reunion by Fayemarie A Carter

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Faye 1Bernie Toucan and Doo Doo Chickadee are sitting on their usual spot by the junction of Fortification and Judgement Streets, having a bit of tea. It is a lovely afternoon and the long time friends are enjoying a lighthearted chat when they feel the wire dip. Both of them look over and give shrieks of surprise.

“Milli!!!! Millicent Audrey Avocet!”, exclaimed Bernie.

“Blue Shanks! Gial! Whe u di du ya?” asked Dodes excitedly. The friends come together for a warm embrace and kisses.

“Well girls. I’m here to bury my grandmother, Aurelia Avocet, memba shi? Granny Ray? She passed a few days ago and I brought her home. She insisted that she be buried here in Belize. U membah how shi does goh? Always have to have shi own way,” Mili smiled wistfully.

“I’m sorry to hear that Milli. I hope it wasn’t too difficult for you and your family?” asked Bernie.

“Well, she was almost 100 so we knew this was coming and the past few months, she was going in and out of the hospital. That was hard because it felt like I never left work, you know? Nurse at work, nurse at home,” said Milli.

“I’m sure she appreciated it, Milli,” said Bernie as she touched her friend reassuring on the shoulder.

“Gial but hmmm! Comin home da neva no joke! Dey harass me every step ah di way. Dey act like ah midi try smuggle drugs or something. Dey nuh know dat if a midi do dat, di coffin mi gwein di opposite direction? What di hell ah wa smuggle into Belize from States?” Milli’s eyes danced as she giggled. “Yu wud tink dey glad dat the immigrant di lef di country, right? Dey stop my rass da every station! Ah neahly miss mi connecting flight home. Ah tell di lady if shi nevah let mi goh, mi granny miya haunt shi rass sake a lef ah fi travel by shi self,’ said Milli.

“Haha!” laughed Dodes.”U nuh change nuh gial. U still di give trouble, big time lady and all.”

“Well! Dey piss mi off man! Ih does be dat I mi glad fi have a Belizean passport. I used to joke that I would nevah want a American one cause dey wa tek mi mek hostage. But hell! Ah di change mi mind. Ah mean, who wahn go thru da process da states? You have to pay almost a thousand dollahs den you hafi study and tek exam. Hmph! But lately, I might prefer be American.”

“Well, u know Milli, lately, wha latta pipple di rail up bout fi we citizenship. How easy it is fi get it and dat anybody could get it fi leebit a money or a simple vote inna elections. Jus di oddah day, PM give hundreds a pipple citizenship. Pipple nevah tek tu kindly. Seh how dey only di du it fi get votes cause dey desperate.” Dodes shook her head. “Milli gial. You might glad u live da States fi tru. Dis country jus di go to rass. Ah mean, why d hell u wa give a bunch a Guatemalans citizenship? Dey don tink we da fi dey? Now dey could vote and buy land and send dey pickney da fi wi school. Ih just bun mi when ah tink bout it.”

“Shit! Ah neva know tings get so bad gial Dodes,” said Milli. But dis rass nuh new mein. When ah midi go da SJC, dey used to talk bout di Chiney di pay like $45,000 fuh wa passport. At least den wi mid get something firit, right? But dis? Dey just di come tek whe dey done tink da fi dey already and we jus give it to dey!” Milli looked over at Bernie who had gotten very quiet, just sipping her tea every now and again. “Bernie. Whe di goh tru da maze a yourns?”

“Ahh.” Bernie sighed.”Ah jus di tink fi tru Milli. Ah mean, what do you do when something like this happen? Who u call? Is there even a process of inquiry?”

“Hey Milli,” said Dodes. “Di one good thing whe come outta dis? Dey gat deya 2 gial name Aria Lightfoot and Fayemarie Carter. Dey two deh awn gial. You know whe Aria seh bout di passport ting? Shi call Belize a prostitute! Something bout open fi business with evibady!” Dodes’ body shakes as she heartily laughs.

“Buwahahahahaha!” laughed Milli. “Dat da wa gud one Dodes! Suh wi da still ‘soldier taffy’? Wi jus do it legal like now. Wow!” Milli sobered as the thoughts swirled around her head. The Belize of her Granny Ray’s days definitely seem to be gone with her. This is one of the major conflicts she struggles with deeply. How can she, Milli, say anything about what is happening in Belize when she lives in a nice house and has a nice job in sunny California? She thinks of coming home often but she knows she is not ready to face this type of life where politics and one’s existence were one and the same. She shook her head as if to shake the thoughts right out. “Anyway, Dodes. Tell mi bout whe deya gial di seh.”

The friends sat on the wire for the next hour, until the sun sprayed its golden tendrils across the land, closing one more day, signalling one more triumph of survival over continued difficulties and challenges to all the good these friends knew as home.

What is your citizenship worth? – by: Aria Lightfoot

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Citizenship means I am part of a country; it means I am co-captain of its future; it means I am a component of a blueprint;   I belong;   my future and past are interconnected. As a citizen, I can vote, agitate, engage, arouse, examine, and change the Constitution and legal framework of my country.  It means that that Belize is me and I am Belize.

Every election season, politicians corrupt my citizenship for cheap votes.  They “Belizeanize” hundreds and in some cases thousands of immigrants who share little or no historical, cultural or social similarity to me.  They give away my impact as voter and further diminish my citizenship, so that immigrant citizens of Guatemala, a country that still claims ownership of Belize, can recreate the blueprint of Belize.  Politicians of both parties have been guilty of the genocide of the Belizean people by systematically changing the cultural, ethnical, religious and social composition of the country. They have treasonously discounted the real citizens’ will and undermined their voting power.

What are the ramifications?   

I am livid, outraged, insulted, dismayed to witness hundreds of immigrants lined up outside the immigration office waiting for their citizenship to be quickly processed before voters registration deadlines, a blatant erosion and devaluation  my citizenship.  Belize allows full rights as a citizen.  It means that the person who was allowed to circumvent the process for an X on Election Day, enjoy the same citizenship as I do. That new citizen can run for public office, even the office as high as the Prime Minister of Belize; demand the benefits of taxpaying citizens such as social security benefits; influence the outcome of an election. It translates into zero political accountability as politicians continue to ignore the concerns of real citizens for ballot box stuffers.   

Even more disconcerting is the long term effects.  How much longer do politicians think it will be before immigrants realize their voting power?  How much longer will it be before Guatemala will no longer need to claim us? Our politicians are handing over Belize vote stuffer by voter stuffer.  How much longer before these political fools realize that their own children will suffer the encumbrance of such short sightedness.

In the US, I will never be able to run for the presidency if I decide to apply for my citizenship because I will not be a born citizen. Even a born citizen cannot run for public office unless they reside in the US for a determined amount of time and twelve years to run for the Presidency.  The politicians cannot circumvent the citizenship process without a vote from Congress (a very open process).  Even Belizeans value gaining citizenship from the United States because they know the process is arduous. After all the other qualifications, the immigrant must pass a background check, citizenship test, endure an interview.    By the time you qualify for citizenship, the United States have indoctrinated the new citizens into the culture of being an American.    Belize has no such system.

Internationally, travelling as a Belizean is becoming a difficult and a harassing experience.  You know why?  Our politicians are giving away our citizenship because they have no value for Belizeans. Our citizenship can be bought for money or votes.  Have you tried getting a visa to visit the United States, Europe or Canada? The processes are becoming more intrusive, stricter, and costly to the average Belizean? In this post 911 era, Belize is like a prostitute, open for business for everyone with money or votes.  Politicians have eroded the significance of my citizenship. I call on this government and future government to secure my children’s future and stop perverting my citizenship and start making laws to bring back an atmosphere of integrity and value to being a Belizean.

Daily Dingleberry 01-15-12

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I don’t like when people make sweeping generalizations about entire groups of people. Those generalizations become nothing more than veiled accusations of the most dastardly kind and it just serves no purpose but to spread hatred and angst. Rebel! It is our duty to change that which we can but rebel FOR something. Today is Sunday, a day of rest for most of us. Give your maleficence a break and smile with your enemy. He’s hurting just as much as you.

Daily Dingleberry 01-14-12

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Watched “Iron Lady” about Margaret Thatcher and it was a remarkable portrayal. Well it’s Meryl Streep, how bad could it be? But it was so stark a realization, to see this one lady surrounded by barking, patronizing, condescending men. No matter what we think of her, she fought a fight few of us could fathom, much less actually do. So, that brings me to the thought: why do we show such disrespect for our leaders? Ok, Ok…don’t shoot me! You can’t catch me anyway, I fly too fast 🙂 But really ponder: what must it be like to be a leader of a third world country, surrounded by the big, intimidating goons of the world? Can you do it? Would you know what to say? how to say it? how to dress? which fork to use? It is a daunting task so before you spew more vitriol and call our leaders horrible derogatory names, take a step back and show some respect, if nothing else for the fact that they are doing what you can’t or won’t. Her adviser said to her “Margaret, if you want to change your party, lead it. You want to change your country, lead it!” So stop talking and start doing lovers!!!!! Or else, sit down and shut the hell up!!!!

Who’s Who on Twocanview -Aria Lightfoot

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Aria Lightfoot

On Faye’s initiative , I am writing my bio and my story leading up this blog for my readers.

Who I am is an ongoing journey in my life. The complexities of whom I am would likely bore most however, here goes:

I was born in Belize City but grew up in Belmopan. My parents were both career civil servants and were one of the “founding families” of Belmopan. As civil servants from the old colonial Belize, they were very ethics oriented and very much dedicated to their professions. My Mother and Father (both deceased) are still very influential in my life today. Both my parents were extremely intelligent and therefore having an intelligent child as myself was almost a given. J

My grandmother told me that when I was only two years old, I would beg her to go to the Indian shop next door to her house on South Street in Belize City. She said to me: “Aria, If I send you to the shop with 10 cents to buy something for 2 cents, how much change will you get” she said I sat and thought it out a while and said “Granny, why don’t you just send me to the shop with two cents to buy something for 2 cents! ” Need I say more..lol

As a student growing up, I excelled in school without studying much and without strict parents (I wish they were stricter with me on this). I would get lost reading our of encyclopedias. I use look things up to learn about it because I wanted to learn about everything. On the pleasure side of reading I enjoyed my mom’s collection of Sidney Sheldon books, Tom Clancy and Danielle Steel and some other hot romances, I was not suppose to be reading. I also enjoyed documentaries and biographies.

I am very nostalgic about growing up in Belmopan. May have been one of George Price’s greatest vision (before the politics began eroding the fabric we see today). Growing up in pan as it is affectionately known, was a very rich experience. I participated in ballet, contemporary dancing, youth groups, basketball and volleyball. I explored everywhere on my bike and on foot, visited nearby rivers and parks. I also traveled a bit as a kid, all over Belize and North America. My aunt was an archaeologist, so we visited many Maya Ruins. I was a big tomboy and as such was constantly chastised to sit properly, don’t whistle “ A whistling woman will never see the gates of heaven” , stop running around with the boys, stop with all the sports etc. I always challenged my Mom and others on these gender roles and use to ask her why would God give us the ability to do things men do, if we are not suppose to. As a child I have always challenged accepted status quo, especially when it came to the limitation of women. Honestly my parents spoiled me and I appreciate them for allowing me to grow in my own path.

One of my highlight (and so I thought), was meeting Philip Michael Thomas, the heartthrob from Miami Vice because my mom was a protocol officer at the time . I spent hours dressing up for him ..only for him compliment my sister on how cute she was…that ended my imaginary love affair. J I also got to go to political rallies with friends from opposing parties and found the entire politics rather entertaining . As students from Belmopan, we also got the privilege of visiting the Supreme Court in session and the House of Representatives and we were pretty much exposed to government all the time, so my interest in government is clear.

However, my world was not perfect. Within my diverse family, I experienced prejudice and classicism . My Mom married a poor black village bway who was a “nobody” police, while her friends and cousins and even siblings were marrying businessmen, “brand name men” (as I love to call them), foreigners etc. and in the social world of Belize creoles that was a “no no”…On my mom’s side of the family, the beauty of hair length, texture and everything Eurocentric was celebrated. One cousin even denied we were related once, obviously too poor to be affiliated with her. On my dad’s side, my cousins called me “white woman” and tease me because of the complexion of my skin. Such messages were confusing to me as a child as I personally could not see a difference, in my child brain, it seems that we were just all different shades of brown and I surely didn’t feel poor. “I didn’t know I was different until someone took the time to point it out” . It had a significant impact to shape who I am as a person. I realized from early that the outside of a person is the least important characteristic of that person.

I went off to SJC 6th form after high school. It was definitely a culture shock for me. The social dividing lines were prominent. People socialized based on status and similar economic background. It exposed me to the realization of the prejudices that is pervasive in our politics today. It was also the year of elections, the first time I actually got involved as a foot soldier, talking to people about voting and making a difference and the first time voting. At that time, politics was insignificant the day after elections was over.

My first year at  6th form years was also one of the most devastating chapters in my life. In 1991 my mom passed away from breast cancer. A disease that came back far more aggressive the second time around. She was my rock, I became a shell of a person for a while as I struggled with such a major change in my early life. All my pursuits was put on pause. I was accepted to the University of Toronto and did not pursue that avenue any further. The 90’s was not over with major losses and turned out to be the most devastating decade of my life. My mom and her two sisters fell victims to breast cancer. My uncle’s wife passed away and then my father. The most influential, foundational and important influences were gone. The biggest cheerleaders in my life were wiped away…in God’s saving grace my son was born in 1995 and it gave me some revitalization of the importance of my dreams.

After 6th form I worked for the airlines and the bank. The jobs were purposeless in making a difference, but secure and comfortable and eventually not for me. I worked at Prosecution Branch in 1999 and that job reignited the dimming light inside me. Working for government (against all the previous advice of my mom) was a difference between night and day, especially coming out of the private sector. The laziness and apathy was unbelievable. The corruption was rampant and the victims were the poor and uneducated and people without access to legal counseling. During my tenure there, I was offered bribes for cases, victim of political interference in cases, witness to unethical behavior of Bar members. The shocking perpetrators of such behavior made me realize I needed to continue pursing my dreams outside this corruptive environment. I walked out of that office with a clear conscience, never taking a bride, never prosecuting an innocent person and never succumbing to such an environment.

At the time, the Canadian Embassy was above the Prosecution Branch, I went upstairs, got an application (the internet was new for Belize), applied online to York University in Canada and the University of South Florida and got accepted to both colleges. The Canadian Embassy was a long arduous process, the US embassy was far more efficient and less bureaucratic, so I ended up in Tampa studying Political Science at the University of South Florida. I have a BA in political Science and excelled in that program. I have also completed one year of law school here in the US, but withdrew and today I am back at USF pursing a Masters in Public Administration.

I remember telling a businessman before I left Belize, that our country will become progressively worse as we selectively prosecute the poor and also because we have no compassion for our youths. I expressed by growing concern about corruption. A prediction easy to make but one I hate to see come to fruition .

I live in the United States but I read everything Belize. The news, magazines, and occasionally the Newspaper. I listen to all the Belize stations via TuneIn radio. The news has become increasingly alarming as the violence is becoming increasingly worse with attacks now being waged against law abiding citizens. Poverty and desperation is growing in Belize even though oil has been added as a major income earner. Corruption is now blatant and seemingly the order of the day.

I have reached out to other Belizeans about Belize’s situation but most people were oblivious, some were blinded by political affiliation, some defensive or offensive and some flatly didn’t care. Facebook has provided a great outlet to bring to light the growing issues in Belize. However, the idea of change has been growing in me for years. My hope is that Belizeans start addressing our issues from a Belizean perspective and not through the lens of politics if we are to forge a future for our children. Faye was one of the few people who I could debate with intellectually, passionately and even in disagreements, it never became personal. Faye is non-traditional, open minded and not afraid of her opinions. When she was censored on “Friends of Belize” Facebook page I realized that she was just the person that need to be uncensored. So here we are today. We started the face book page on Christmas Day and have had over 1000 hits. Our purpose is clear. We plan to discuss the issues in a serious and humorous way, away from political influence and pressure and hopefully in a balanced perspective. We are also on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/Twocanview. I hope you read, engage, and be part of a change to build a prosperous Belize for our children and many generations after we have gone.

Who is “Who Who” on Twocanview

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Apparently people didn’t find this on the site but it is under “Welcome to Our Blog-Fayemarie Anderson Carter”.

So…who am I? First off, I am a woman. I am a citizen of the world and I belong to no one. I have faced unbelievable circumstances all my life and even before I was  born. Basically, I shouldn’t  be here. My mother had a difficult pregnancy and was on bed rest the last months. With all the precautions taken and advantages of having a father who was a medical intern, it still didn’t prevent me from being born premature and kinda dead for a while. That should have been the clue to the world “Watch out! She’s a fighter!” Well but, I didn’t always know that and many things knocked me down and there were times I felt hopeless and helpless.

I had a very confusing, complicated childhood. I felt like I had each foot in a different world so that I was constantly trying to balance between them. There were a lot of misconceptions about my family and our intentions. It went from “You’re white, you don’t care”; “You’re rich; why do you care?” to “Oh you’re poor, who cares?” Despite all that, I couldn’t help but grow up with an intense feeling of obligation and sense of civic duty. I was a quiet child (the irony, I know) so I was often unseen as I observed adults (many of whom, became leaders of our communities) discuss, argue, make plans and sound ridiculous. I was in the back of a government  vehicle once, when an adviser to a minister (no names) actually recommended that we remove social studies from the elementary school curriculum and I was just stupefied by this intense stupidity. His estimation of social studies was “it is a waste of time”. With this attitude, we wonder why we are where we are????

On the other hand, living in Dangriga, I couldn’t very well insulate  and isolate myself from the realities of regular folk. First of all, I lived smack dab in the middle of town. All the shops, the police station, the banks, churches, schools, government offices and the hospital was right there within a two block radius. Secondly, I didn’t want to. I wanted to play “toad” and punta and “bathe sea”. I wanted to crack my supa seed with the door stop by the church. I wanted to “plait” my hair and “walk bout street”. Even if people wanted to think that I was not part of the society because of my parents, my ancestry (I lived on a street named after my paternal family for goodness’ sake) anyone who looked closely would have seen that I faced many of the same issues everyone else did and then some. Not only did I have to wait every day for my dad to see a patient so I could get $10 to buy bread and milk, people wanted us to donate to everything. I always got picked, in school, to donate the most expensive item like a chicken or the cake. Multiply that times 4 Anderson children and that was half our weekly grocery budget.

I was often ashamed and proud at the same time. Crazy making, I tell you. Case in point. My dad loves to spread Christmas cheer to those who wouldn’t otherwise know it. I understood that about my dad and actually, I am so guilty of it myself. The price for that? I wrapped hundreds of gifts for everyone else while my Christmas gift was the bloody Christmas dress I needed to wear to church. Some gift. LOL. Or how about that time I got a blanket, or the time I got a fan? (I was glad for it don’t mind me)  but I was a kid too dammit and I wanted toys! I really did only have two church dresses. My snobbish middle class friends loved to make feel me inferior because they had the latest styles from “States” and would tell me things like “Gial, u noh fraid da dress staat to talk?” Stupid, mean girls.

The blessing of this kind of upbringing is that I learned to empathize. I learned what it feels like to not belong and I didn’t belong anywhere. Too po fi di rich pipple, too white fi di po pipple and when I moved to the States, not white enough for the Americans. So,  I learned to like myself. I had to. Nobody else did! I read and read and read. I would get lashin’ because I was reading books and not washing the dishes or I let the clothes get wet on the line because I forgot to pick them in. I learned to make toys out of old seasoning cans and match boxes; I turned them into doll house furniture. I made dolls out of mangoes and tried to sew my own doll clothes (I say try because I often made them too tight LOL). Books were like gold to me. Everything I read, I depended on the library for so that the highlight of my year, was when the ship came from England with new library books. I read about Judy and  Maisy and nothing was more hotly traded than the latest Nancy Drew or Hardy Boys book. When I was actually GIVEN a book, I treasured it and read and reread till it damn near fell apart. I still had the books Mary K Carridi (I called her Aunt Kath, back then) gave me until 1998 when I left them with my parents, not knowing that they would be following me not a few months later. Sorry, Kathy, but I think the books,  a copy of Jack and Jill published in 1898 and B is for Betsy, were lost in one of the hurricanes . Those books, the latter, especially, gave me dreams of another kind of childhood, filled with pink clouds and fantasy, sweet memory for sure.

Today, I am married to an American and I have two girls, 19 and 10. I have lived in different countries and states. Just look at my Facebook page and you’ll see all the colleges/universities I “visited” 🙂 I graduated in 2006 from Adler Graduate School with an MA in Counseling Psychology but I haven’t written my thesis yet (long story) so I may never actually get that piece of paper :P. Fingers crossed, I’ll get it done soon now that I am a work at home mom, again. Before now, I worked in the Bloomington, MN school system as a contracted therapist/case manager in a special education program. I worked with children and families struggling with challenges that come with diagnoses of emotional/behavioural disorders such as ADHD, ODD, Bi-polar, Depression, Anxiety, Autism.

I was asked by Aria Lightfoot to be part of this blog addressing the issues facing our Belizean people and I didn’t hesitate for more than a second. Politics have scarred my heart but I decided to take a chance anyway and be a part of what I hope becomes known as a “revolution”. I hope to impart knowledge and insight but mostly compassion and empathy for our fellow citizens. We won’t get anywhere if we don’t understand that we are all in it together. Blue and Red makes PURPLE and that’s where we are: bruised and battered.