Central America

Daily Dingleberry 03-19-12 Wot’s Yer Pernt?

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Creeper

You evah get di feelin dat eyes are followin you and shadows creep in the dark? It’s ok darlins. You can relax. No matter how you look…you will be disappointed. Is it really that hard to believe that people could just be what they say they are? That is so sad for you that you haven’t had the chance to be around people who are sincere and full of compassion for their fellow citizens. Let me once again reassure you so that perhaps I can garner your support in my efforts. I just want to bring light to things that are impeding our progress as a society. I want old people to live with dignity; children to be excited by life and parents to energized by hope. What a wonderful world that would be. In the future, Aria and I would like to lend our support to Cancer/Diabetes Awareness; involving our youth in the democratic process; form a non-profit org or two with the aim of providing school supplies/lunches/clothing to our students; educate anyone, who wants to be, in the finer points of political issues so they make the choices which benefits them and their communities and just soooo much more.

While you attempt to corrupt our good intentions, slander our reputations and decry our actions, I simply ask you to direct your attention to what really matters: Belizeans. Feel me? Join me? That’s the spirit!

Daily Dingleberry 03-17-12 Methinks the Jealous do Protest too Much

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We will stand alone.

LMAO! So, wild accusations are flying about causing much consternation for my co-blogger Aria. Her every ethical and honest bone is being rattled by all these blatant attempts to discredit her and my intentions. BUT I frankly don’t give a damn. As the saying goes, “Any press is good press”. I welcome the spin doctors and the naysayers because you are doing exactly  what I want you to do. You are bringing attention to my efforts to provide honest critiques of the goings on in Belize. Every time you say my name, you give me legitimacy.

Let’s practice: twocanview, twocanview, twocanview. OOOOPS! You done sed it 3 times!!!!! You in trouble now!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!

The only reason nasty people get nasty is because they feel their own power being usurped. What’s the best thing to do to someone who is gaining ground? You try to remove the ground- in this case, accuse us of bribery and calling us unethical and biased. But that will prove to be  a misguided move because I’m standing on diamonds, my convictions are that strong and pure. You will only reinforce my stance and expose for the world to see that I really am who and what I say I am.

I could get caught up in being disappointed in people and their attempts to destroy a good thing that really could have a positive impact on politics in Belize but I’m  not gonna belabour it. To be honest, things like this are to be expected and it’s sort of anti-climatic for me, because I thought it would  have come a lot sooner.

So keep spinning and repeat 3X: twocanview, twocanview, twocanview!!!!!!!!!

Daily Dingleberry 03-13-12

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Twocanview marks the spot!

I’M BAWWWWK BITCHES!!!!!!!!!! What an interesting two weeks I spent in Belize! So much to discuss and comment on 😉 Still a little tired though so I’m just gonna say hi and yes, I missed you all. I got to meet a lot of our twocanview followers. That was so much fun and thanks for your continued support.

Daily Dingleberry 02-18-12 Angry Blue Birds

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Are you people listening with you logical and analytic brain, the front part, or just the  reptilian brain, the back paat whe responsible for “aggression, dominance, territoriality, and ritual displays”?

I hope it is the former for your own benefit because what these politicians are trying to pull is just insulting. They want us to believe shit that is easily disproved and verifiable. What am I talking about? The Schakron Shennanigans of course! (notice ah lawn fi spell shi name karreck! :))

Yesterday, Ms. Schakron was declared ineligible to run in these elections because of her dual citizenship with the US and Belize. So far, I don’t see the problem…there is a law, and it was followed. O wait. Is that the problem? Have we become so used to just doing whatever the fuck we want that when somebody actually has the audacity to follow protocol, we react with shock and despair and hollah “INJUSTICE”?

HOLY SHIT BUCKET!!!! The irony is not lost on me and it better not be on you or else you need fuh get back anda di covahs, sleep so mo and den wake up again! Ms. Lisa Shoman went on tv, so will forever have her statements documented, and said that an injustice occurred and that some people da Belize nuh like democracy. BUWAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT THE FUUUUUCK?????

Lookya Lisa, nuh ehm yu mi look convinced bout dat one. How can an injustice be claimed when infact it was merely a decision reflecting the law of the land? O you nuh like di law? Change it den! O wait. Dah yu mi seh no right?!

Sorry mein. Ah nuh mean fi di laff so haad but that is what I do. I laugh at downright idiocy and simpleness. You guys are truly just handing me fodder for the exploiting. I’m laughing all day, everyday.

And den night falls and the laughter drifts away and it is replaced with real true sadness.

How can we hope for anything different when you guys insist on act exactly the same? You have Ms. Shakron hollerin and screamin like a goddammed banshee  http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=QevJI9JE8r0

and Lisa Shoman, a woman of the law, acting outraged that the law was followed http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=xCRuOw9XGy0

Holy what frig is this? You guys took no responsibility for your errors. You point the finger squarely at people who had nothing to do with your inability to read simple English and realize the requirements were not going to allow for her candidacy. Why couldn’t you simply have acted in the best interest of your party and the people you serve and behave like law abiding citizens?

I will tell you this. I hope that you guys are not allowed to take leadership roles anymore, not in this arena. I love the causes Ms. Shoman champions and I absolutely would love to the see the women’s agenda put into action but after thisya rass, your credibility is on the line and I frankly, cannot trust in your abilities to fight fair and fight right. I question that you will able to represent my needs as a woman and make good decisions in my name. And I sure as shit don’t want either of you representing me in the diplomatic corps either.

These emotional outbursts and hollerin and screamin may have worked on  a people used to being screamed at and put down in the past by their colonial masters, but hopefully , not  on this generation. We are smart, informed and on to you. Stop trying to insult us with your condescending attempts to pull the wool…we aint no bloody sheep. Dem days dun!

What Buggery is Dis? by Fayemarie Anderson Carter

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We have all heard the religious rhetoric surrounding  Sec 53, you know (in lowered voice) the gay law. Pastor Dis and Bishop Dat decided that they would just ignore the fact that we are NOT, I repeat NOT a religious state BUT a democracy. See, people get sooooo confused with the word DEMOCRACY but in simple simple simple words, it means  “the freedom to call something into being which did not exist before, which was not given… and which therefore, strictly speaking, could not be known.”[5] This type of freedom, which is connected to human “natality,” or the capacity to begin anew, sees democracy as “not only a political system… [but] an ideal, an aspiration, really, intimately connected to and dependent upon a picture of what it is to be human—of what it is a human should be to be fully human.”[6] 

Not simple enough? Mek ah try: it is a process by which what nevah exist before, could exist NOW!

Read on:

While there is no universally accepted definition of ‘democracy’,[7] equality and freedom have both been identified as important characteristics of democracy since ancient times.[8] These principles are reflected in all citizens being equal before the law and having equal access to legislative processes.

And then some more:

Majority rule is often listed as a characteristic of democracy. However, it is also possible for a minority to be oppressed by a “tyranny of the majority” in the absence of governmental or constitutional protections of individual or group rights. An essential part of an “ideal” representative democracy is competitiveelections that are fair both substantively[16] and procedurally.[17] Furthermore, freedom of political expression, freedom of speech, and freedom of the press are considered to be essential, so that citizens are adequately informed and able to vote according to their own best interests as they see them.[18][19] It has also been suggested that a basic feature of democracy is the capacity of individuals to participate freely and fully in the life of their society.[20] 

AHHHHH CRAAAAAAPPPPP!!!! NOW I SEE WHAT THE PROBLEM IS!!!!!

Ok. Now that we have an idea of what democracy is, let’s look at RELIGIOUS FREEDOM. People like Pastor Dis and Bishop Dat feel that because God is on their side and they believe in Jesus that for some reason, they are superior to everyone else. At this point, you should all be raising your hands and asking the teacher, “But, Miss? Doesn’t that contradict what you just said about democracy?”

Ahm, frankly YEEEESSSSS! People confuse the right to practice religion with the rest of democratic principles. And don’t worry, it’s not just in Belize. I am not picking on you but I won’t let you get away with it just because al Qaeda blew up a couple a buildings and does it worse that you. The following is a case that explains it perfectly. And YES I know it’s an American case, but they’ve been doing this whole independence/democratic nation thing a lot longer than we have so…they could teach us a thing or two:

 

In Employment Division v. Smith, a pair of men who were fired from their jobs for ingesting peyote during Native American religious ceremonies sued when their applications for unemployment were denied because they had been fired for cause from their jobs. The US Supreme Court ruled that since the prohibitions on drug use is a neutral law of general applicability that the religious freedom argument didn’t come into play. From the decision:
“Laws, we said, are made for the government of actions, and while they cannot interfere with mere religious belief and opinions, they may with practices. . . . Can a man excuse his practices to the contrary because of his religious belief? To permit this would be to make the professed doctrines of religious belief superior to the law of the land, and in effect to permit every citizen to become a law unto himself.”

In other words, lovers, lovers of Belize, we have the freedom to practice our religious beliefs BUT CAN’T HOLD IT SUPERIOR TO THE LAW OF THE LAND!!!!!! Soh dem weed smokers whe seh dey do it because  a JAH…dem Pastor Dis and Bishop Dat whe seh that homosexuals should be prosecuted because dat dah whe GOD seh? Dem Muslims whe mutilate girls, cutting off their sexual organs to keep them pure because ALLAH seh soh? YOU CAN’T DO THAT IN A DEMOCRATIC COUNTRY AND IF YOU DO YOU ARE SUBJECT TO PROSECUTION AS ANYONE ELSE IS.

Now…I am hard pressed to understand why the hell a country run by a bunch of lawyers couldn’t figure this one out and make a stand for the development and progress of our democracy…buggery..I tell you…just plain old buggery. Bend ovah and insert bukut.
 

Wifey and Sweetheart Get Di Bukut!!!! by Fayemarie Anderson Carter

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Suh…. I am so sure that you have heard EVERY Belizean man and woman seh dat dey don’t tolerate cheating but if da like how dey deal wid di palitishan dem? Well. You know exactly how dat end!

From the time we are old enough to talk, if you are a girl, people tell you to “keep your shape; lawn fi cook; nuh laff tu loud; cross yu leg; be a good girl OR ELSE yu nuh wa get a good man”.  Ting is, da whe dey tell di man dem? Caz ah nu tink dey get di memo. You might hear “be a man, stop cry; beat dat, nuh mek nobadi tawk to you suh; les go da Mile 8; tell u gial u gwen play basketball or tell shi da nun a fi shi business whe u goh; you mek di money, shi fi just shet up and serve you yuh dinnah!”

So girl marries boy. She might have a job but that doesn’t matter. She still washes, cooks, takes care of the kids, and cleans up after everyone. She doesn’t get a say in how money is spent or how decisions are made BUT she must honour whatever arrangements her husband might make so that they “look good”. So, she cooks for people she doesn’t like; she raises funds for causes she doesn’t support; she watches her man go to the bar and blow his pay check while the pickney need school uniform and books; and if she raises her concern, she bettah watch she don’t get slap right affa fi shi foot! Caz he da di boss and u bettah know your damn place. And if you dare nuh listen, he wa lef yu rass and tek a sweetheart. And if you reeeeeally piss him off, while you stay home and mind yu pickney? He wa ker she da fancy restaurant and buy ah sum chicken and suh Belikin fi wash it down. AND the cherry on top of that humiliating cheating, lying and beat up Sundae is? He will blame you and seh da caz yu get fat, or yu like rail up tu much or yu dah jus nuh fun no moh.

So den yuh get caught up inna wa love triangle, square, pentagon? Some wifeys think dey getting revenge by cheating right back; some stay deh and pretend like dey dont know, and den di Shali pickney staat show up da di back dooh. And one day, shi look inna di mirror and realize dat she’s all thorns and no rose. See, cause she told herself, “I live inna di big house”; “my pickney gat fi hi name”; “he come home to me” ;”I da Mrs”.

Di sweetheart she? Well, she get reputation so nobody in society wants to associate her and she finds herself being passed around from one married man to the next, each time, she tells herself  “dis one love me..si di pretty bracelet? si di new refridge? And mi baby got soft hair like ih daddy”; “dis one wa lef ih wife”. But he doesn’t and she cries again and soon shi look inna di mirror and realize she is all thorns and no rose.

The sweetheart and wifey might sometimes meet in public and wifey cut shi eye; sweetheart hallah bout “mi son da fi yu man!” Each one has her posse in her corner whe jeer and sweat fevah.  Wifey is the victim because of “that low down sketel di try tief wa good honest man like mi husband. Shi da jus wa homewreckah! Don’t that street gial realize that shi di tek mi pickney food outta dey mouth and dey pa from whe he belang? She so sleck, shi gat pickney fuh all kinda man, dey all gat different name!” The Sweetheart is the victim because “that fat cow nuh wa give mi man wa divorce! Don’t that old hux realize dat him nuh luv ah numoh? She da just di stupidest ass fi di try hold awn to something whe nuh wah she! He tell mi dat shi cant give a di sex like me!”

Now turn dat into a lovestory about the PUP, UDP and Belizeans. “Mrs.” da di diehard. Those voters will stick to their party like the wife to the husband. They hide the lies; they defend their behaviour and all the while, everybody can see that their eyes black and blue and swollen from the bitchlick. But, they hold on for dear life because they just can’t imagine no different and don’t believe they deserve better. The sweetheart? They are the voters just looking for a handout. They keep switching sides, chasing the one with the sweetest lines and the biggest promises, telling themselves  “this time will be different!”; “He da di one!” And, they do that because they also can’t can’t imagine no different and don’t believe that they deserve better. The two a dem fraid fi challenge because all of a sudden, they will lose their job, or they will be publicly ridiculed or they will lose funding for some project or a loan will be recalled or their children won’t get scholarships or even considered for positions they are qualified for. O and the latest one, you might get sued for slander and libel.

And the man? When him dead, him happy and content. After all, he get what he mi want right? And he tell himself that both dem bitches lucky he tolerate either one a dem. Dey bettah just know. He da di boss. Whe dey gat fi camplain bout? Wifey inna house and sweetheart get shi chicken. Ting dun. Him pave your street and give di other one wa ham. Ting dun.

Whe miya seh? Step back. The only reason this keeps happening over and over is caz like the Wifey and the Sweetheart, we, the Belizeans don’t believe it can be different or that we deserve any better.  We have allowed a bunch of self serving, egotistical, deceitful, unethical, criminal politicians to take over that which is ours and we settle for the pittance they decide we deserve. They don’t even fight their own battles cause like the wife and the sweetheart, dey posse do it for them.  I mean, we do it for them. We call each other names and refuse to work together against corruption and fight for our rights. Meanwhile, they ride around in their air conditioned rides and vacation on their private islands, whe dey just tief fram yu, by the way.

So…on this here Valentine’s Day..kick dey no good cheaters to di curb…wifey and sweetheart need fi tell huzzy who da di boss! Stop fight each other and fight together for what’s right. First you have to love yourself don’t you? Buy yu own damn chocolate and flowers numa! And make dat man know it is his privilege to be with you! Just like we need to let our leaders know “It is a privilege to serve US”. When Wifey and Sweetheart wa realize dat it aint about them but about the children they both have to watch suffer? And those kids got one name: Belizean.

Daily Dingleberry 02-14-12

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You can have free speech as long as you agree with me ’cause if  ya don’t, ahma sue yo a$$ for slander and libel.

UGH!!!!!

O come on now, put yo big girl panties on and pull on your big boy draws and step it up…all dis childish ego maniacal flish flash (I know that ain’t no real word so don’t write me about it) is making me tyad. And the Belizean people tyad…caz while you pullin’ rank, we still waitin’!!!!! We still want bread and medicines and education.

Can we have some good role models up in here? We got enough school yard bullies running around, bitches.

Daily Dingleberry 02-08-12

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Be the Change You Want to See

SOOOOOoooooooooooooooo….I have had the opportunity to get real close to some controversy stewing and bubbling under the surface in our medical community. I’m not going to delve into it here. Instead I want to ask that everyone take a step back and center their thoughts, feelings and redefine their purpose.

It is always gut wrenching when we are face to face with poverty and the plight of the poor. Babies die from simple preventable maladies like dehydration. Mothers die from cancer and leave their children motherless. Fathers don’t live to give their little girls away or raise their sons to be men. It is sad. It is devastating. And some of us are deeply moved by these stories and the pained faces telling them. Some of us turn away. Some of us dig in and fight to overcome.

While these fighters are sincere and their fight noble, we can not let emotions undermine our good work and progress. The harsh reality is we are a poor nation. Resources are few to nonexistent. The government, red or blue, will always have way more on their plate than they can possibly handle. Throw in some ignorant, under educated, greedy, unscrupulous, egotistical maniacs and it just became 10x harder to get anything done. In this way, even people with good intentions will find themselves bogged down in the mire of corruption, stagnation and party politics. Barring ALL that and sometimes, you just have to consider that there isn’t the money to get the job done.

Sadly, it seems that this is where we turn on each other and destroy the only layer left between the poor and abject poverty and misery.

Please let’s not do this. Life can be incredibly long when filled with strife and difficulty. Just because we don’t get what we want right this second while we are buoyed by passion and conviction, doesn’t mean that the issue will go away or lose its importance any time soon. Much is accomplished by individuals rather than a government and perhaps that is the way to needs to be. Keep your heart strong and your determination stronger and you will get what you want. But if you burn bridges along the way and attack the very people who are supporting you, you just may end up causing more difficulty and strife for the very people you were hoping to help.

Sometimes you gotta kiss till you can kick and ain’t nothing wrong with knowing when to do that when you have a larger purpose than yourself.

Daily Dingleberry 02-07-12

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What democracy is NOT but has become

Double edged sword is what it is…what is? This politician/god thing we got going here. Of course, it stems from our complicated colonial/buccaneering history. As much as we hate to hear it, we do live it. People are still very much stratified according to colour of skin and position in Belize. To an onlooker, it might be impossible to imagine. We all look brown, right? We all ain’t white, right? So, what is the problem?

Well, actually I think that makes it worse because it pits brother against brother, grandchild against grandmother. Is it any wonder then, that we glorify our leaders?

Our socioeconomic situation creates intense desperation and fierce competition for the few opportunities and resources available, so when one of us “makes it” in politics, we clamor for his/her attention and favour. This may flatter and appeal to our “hero complex” but that doesn’t last long, I’m sure. Soon enough, there is too much to deal with, not enough time, money and manpower and before you know it, people get frustrated, disappointed and then, resentful. That leader we thought was better than free cheese and sliced bread becomes in our estimation, greedy, self serving, “out of touch”, hypocritical and downright demonic. We vote them out. Rinse. Repeat. And we are in the hole we are in.

Look people. Don’t give politicians qualities best reserved for saints. Politicians, don’t make promises you can’t keep just to win temporary adoration and votes.

We need to mature as a nation. We have to stop this codependency we got going on among our constituents and our politicians. That politician will not solve our problems and our constituents can’t pull themselves up by their bootstraps if they don’t gats no boots! We have to find a medium where politicians just do their jobs i.e. overseeing the appropriation of funding for beneficial projects; negotiate loans and settle border disputes. Politicians need to insist that our judicial system is sound and that our streets are safe. AND WE THE PEOPLE need to realize that WE ARE THEIR BOSS, not the other way around.

We, the people, need to understand our rights, our responsibilities and start taking ourselves seriously. We need to understand what a politician is really obligated to do. We need to set up firm boundaries between what is his/her job and what he/she just can not and should not do . What is unethical versus illegal? What is within the realm of government versus what is beyond?

While we figure it out, I appeal to your sense of decency and fairness. Display decorum and respect. It is the only way to make progress. And politicians… smdh…admit you fucked up. You have no idea how far that will go to restoring good faith and confidence in your abilities. It takes great courage to admit one’s mistakes and people really are just waiting to hear you humble yourselves and for once, do the right thing. We have been on borrowed time. The bottom will fall out. Let’s try to avoid that please. We have so much to gain if we work together and not against each other. And while we are it, throw some bitches in jail.

OWN YOUR VOTE. OWN YOUR FUTURE.

Daily Dingleberry 02-06-12

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Freddie Mercury of QUEEN

I wonder how many people think about the fact that when they are at a game where male hormones and sweat create an oppressive sweet stink, the song that riles them up the most was written by a GAY man?

Yes. It is true. “We Are The Champions” was written by Freddie Mercury, the head queen of the band QUEEN. The song was on the “A” side of one of dem itty bitty 45’s with, guess what on the other side? “We Will Rock You” was written by  QUEEN’s lead guitarist Brian May.

So, if you want to be a true homophobe, make sure you don’t caught shaking your fists and wiggling your ass to either of these songs, ok???? We, the rest of the logical thinking, tolerant lovers of all people and our differences world, would like it if you would identify your ignorant, fear and hate mongering self, by raising your voice in singular protest and walking out of whatever arena you are in. We would really not like to add “hypocrite” to the list of adjectives we use to describe people like you. If you find yourself unable to do so, then you will have to face the realization that you just might secretly like gay people and you will have to drop the whole “I hate all fags and you are going to hell” thing. Are you swallowing hard just about now? It’s that crow you’re eating.

Promote love and acceptance for all, people. Support your GBLT community and call people out when you see them being hateful. Gays are human beings with feelings and gifts and love to spread just like you and I. Respect their right to decency and dignity. CHANGE THE LAWS THAT OPPRESS YOUR FELLOW MAN. If you believe in god, you should already know not to judge…ooooh…YOU might be the one going to hell…

ugh