A Nation of Bullies by: Aria Lightfoot


 

Freedom of religion does not give you the right to physically or verbally assault people.” Jim C. Hines

I write today with feelings of melancholy and disappointment. I am realizing that writing is an emotional journey, especially when writing from a position of advocacy.  Yesterday, I read the news and listened to Caleb Orosco describe his physical attack.  I was ashamed of my fellow Belizeans to resort to such disgraceful behavior. A young man offends the moral conscience of “Christians” so much that he was attacked and brutalized unprovoked as he walked the streets.  As I listen to him describe his attack, I heard a deflated, abused and bullied young man who is further victimized by a system that refuses to address his injustice.  Later as I read the online news, I realized Caleb was once again bullied emotionally by the insensitive commenter’s celebrating his attack, questioning his integrity and advocating for harsher treatment. My God, who are we becoming in Belize?

I am even more disappointed with the failure of the Churches of Belize to strongly condemn these criminal acts; disappointed with the failure of the justice system to acknowledge it. For the most part, the churches and champions of Christ were silent on the issue, possibly enjoying the power they have to move people to such passions of hatred.  Who else in history was treated with so much hatred, contempt and violence? Oh yes! Jesus, Jews, Blacks, Minorities,  Martin Luther King, Mandela, Gandhi and countless, nameless and dead individuals who suffered at the hands of discriminatory, judgmental narcissistic individuals who would prefer to see a fellow human dead than accept diversity.

Growing up in Belize, I was one of those judgmental, ignorant people who believed that people who were gay should live with the consequences of their action. People choose to be gay, so why should I care? I stood with the majority, mainly because it was not an issue that affected me. How selfish my thoughts were and maybe a bit self-absorbed believing the world should be as I want it to be! However, as I journey through life and reflect, I realized how my views have changed since then. Living in America for the past decade has given me a whole new perspective of being a minority.  It is easy to stand on a pedestal of judgment when we are comfortable in the majority, but a person’s true integrity is evident when he/she can decry the evil of the majority. I thank God for Jesus, Gandhi, Martin Luther King and Mandela and nameless others, who refused to back down from their positions; even though they were the minority positions of their time; they refused to succumb to threats, intimidation, violence and bullies! I am free today because those who came before me were intolerant of hatred, ignorance and discrimination.

It brings me to my next point. We are a society of bullies! ” Bullying is a form of aggressive behavior manifested by the use of force or coercion to affect others.” It can include name calling, intimidation,  writing nasty letters, emails or blogs, exclusion, making people feel inferior, inadequate or uncomfortable, assaulting, and forcing them to do things they would not want to do.  It involves an imbalance of power usually on grounds of race, ethnicity, culture,  religion, gender, sexuality, ability, standards of beauty or socio economic position. The abuse can be done overtly as in Orosco’s case or subtly. The list is not exhaustive.  The “imbalance of power” may be social, economic, political, religious and/or physical power.  The sad reality is that we have all been on the receiving end of a bully, but instead of saying no more, we actually perpetrate it on a weaker person. We compare our children; demoralize them; we talk behind our friends’ backs; we strive to do better than people just to look down on them; we interfere with people’s lives and livelihood; we beat our spouses and children;  we find faults and constantly tease;  and we spend a lot of time “hating” on each other.

One infamous historical figure visited the Caribbean to learn our social bullying tactics of “divide and conquer”, a mandated British policy during slavery.  His name was Willie Lynch who inspired  Jim Crow laws. The tradition of bullying has been ingrained in our society for centuries as a control mechanism and  handed down through our families, peers, teachers, churches, political leaders, writers,  spouses and we in turn bully our children, family, peers and anyone who would dare deviate from what is considered” normal”.  The bully gets a sense of satisfaction and power in knowing that he/she can intimidate a person into submission. The rhetoric of some religious leaders telling people to hate, to be intolerant, quoting death and violence verses from the Bible is in fact bullying. Church leaders can get of sense of power and accomplishment taking on a minority unpopular position while ignoring unabated corruption, poverty, child abuse, spousal abuse and spiraling violent crimes. The bully cowers at a bigger bully.

As the fight for acceptance ensues in our courtroom and society, I call on all leaders to break the cycle of abuse and bullying. Encourage supporters to be civil and respectful. If God intended for all of us to be the same, he would have made us all the same. If you believe that God made us all in his image, then when you bully Caleb Orosco or any person in your life, you are bullying one of God’s creations. I refuse to be a victim or perpetrator of bullying anymore and I hope anyone reading this similarly commit to stop bullying and promote civility in our culture.

Daily Dingleberry 02-08-12


Be the Change You Want to See

SOOOOOoooooooooooooooo….I have had the opportunity to get real close to some controversy stewing and bubbling under the surface in our medical community. I’m not going to delve into it here. Instead I want to ask that everyone take a step back and center their thoughts, feelings and redefine their purpose.

It is always gut wrenching when we are face to face with poverty and the plight of the poor. Babies die from simple preventable maladies like dehydration. Mothers die from cancer and leave their children motherless. Fathers don’t live to give their little girls away or raise their sons to be men. It is sad. It is devastating. And some of us are deeply moved by these stories and the pained faces telling them. Some of us turn away. Some of us dig in and fight to overcome.

While these fighters are sincere and their fight noble, we can not let emotions undermine our good work and progress. The harsh reality is we are a poor nation. Resources are few to nonexistent. The government, red or blue, will always have way more on their plate than they can possibly handle. Throw in some ignorant, under educated, greedy, unscrupulous, egotistical maniacs and it just became 10x harder to get anything done. In this way, even people with good intentions will find themselves bogged down in the mire of corruption, stagnation and party politics. Barring ALL that and sometimes, you just have to consider that there isn’t the money to get the job done.

Sadly, it seems that this is where we turn on each other and destroy the only layer left between the poor and abject poverty and misery.

Please let’s not do this. Life can be incredibly long when filled with strife and difficulty. Just because we don’t get what we want right this second while we are buoyed by passion and conviction, doesn’t mean that the issue will go away or lose its importance any time soon. Much is accomplished by individuals rather than a government and perhaps that is the way to needs to be. Keep your heart strong and your determination stronger and you will get what you want. But if you burn bridges along the way and attack the very people who are supporting you, you just may end up causing more difficulty and strife for the very people you were hoping to help.

Sometimes you gotta kiss till you can kick and ain’t nothing wrong with knowing when to do that when you have a larger purpose than yourself.

Daily Dingleberry 02-07-12


What democracy is NOT but has become

Double edged sword is what it is…what is? This politician/god thing we got going here. Of course, it stems from our complicated colonial/buccaneering history. As much as we hate to hear it, we do live it. People are still very much stratified according to colour of skin and position in Belize. To an onlooker, it might be impossible to imagine. We all look brown, right? We all ain’t white, right? So, what is the problem?

Well, actually I think that makes it worse because it pits brother against brother, grandchild against grandmother. Is it any wonder then, that we glorify our leaders?

Our socioeconomic situation creates intense desperation and fierce competition for the few opportunities and resources available, so when one of us “makes it” in politics, we clamor for his/her attention and favour. This may flatter and appeal to our “hero complex” but that doesn’t last long, I’m sure. Soon enough, there is too much to deal with, not enough time, money and manpower and before you know it, people get frustrated, disappointed and then, resentful. That leader we thought was better than free cheese and sliced bread becomes in our estimation, greedy, self serving, “out of touch”, hypocritical and downright demonic. We vote them out. Rinse. Repeat. And we are in the hole we are in.

Look people. Don’t give politicians qualities best reserved for saints. Politicians, don’t make promises you can’t keep just to win temporary adoration and votes.

We need to mature as a nation. We have to stop this codependency we got going on among our constituents and our politicians. That politician will not solve our problems and our constituents can’t pull themselves up by their bootstraps if they don’t gats no boots! We have to find a medium where politicians just do their jobs i.e. overseeing the appropriation of funding for beneficial projects; negotiate loans and settle border disputes. Politicians need to insist that our judicial system is sound and that our streets are safe. AND WE THE PEOPLE need to realize that WE ARE THEIR BOSS, not the other way around.

We, the people, need to understand our rights, our responsibilities and start taking ourselves seriously. We need to understand what a politician is really obligated to do. We need to set up firm boundaries between what is his/her job and what he/she just can not and should not do . What is unethical versus illegal? What is within the realm of government versus what is beyond?

While we figure it out, I appeal to your sense of decency and fairness. Display decorum and respect. It is the only way to make progress. And politicians… smdh…admit you fucked up. You have no idea how far that will go to restoring good faith and confidence in your abilities. It takes great courage to admit one’s mistakes and people really are just waiting to hear you humble yourselves and for once, do the right thing. We have been on borrowed time. The bottom will fall out. Let’s try to avoid that please. We have so much to gain if we work together and not against each other. And while we are it, throw some bitches in jail.

OWN YOUR VOTE. OWN YOUR FUTURE.

Daily Dingleberry 02-06-12


Freddie Mercury of QUEEN

I wonder how many people think about the fact that when they are at a game where male hormones and sweat create an oppressive sweet stink, the song that riles them up the most was written by a GAY man?

Yes. It is true. “We Are The Champions” was written by Freddie Mercury, the head queen of the band QUEEN. The song was on the “A” side of one of dem itty bitty 45’s with, guess what on the other side? “We Will Rock You” was written by  QUEEN’s lead guitarist Brian May.

So, if you want to be a true homophobe, make sure you don’t caught shaking your fists and wiggling your ass to either of these songs, ok???? We, the rest of the logical thinking, tolerant lovers of all people and our differences world, would like it if you would identify your ignorant, fear and hate mongering self, by raising your voice in singular protest and walking out of whatever arena you are in. We would really not like to add “hypocrite” to the list of adjectives we use to describe people like you. If you find yourself unable to do so, then you will have to face the realization that you just might secretly like gay people and you will have to drop the whole “I hate all fags and you are going to hell” thing. Are you swallowing hard just about now? It’s that crow you’re eating.

Promote love and acceptance for all, people. Support your GBLT community and call people out when you see them being hateful. Gays are human beings with feelings and gifts and love to spread just like you and I. Respect their right to decency and dignity. CHANGE THE LAWS THAT OPPRESS YOUR FELLOW MAN. If you believe in god, you should already know not to judge…ooooh…YOU might be the one going to hell…

ugh

Daily Dingleberry 02-05-12


The Face of Belize

*Sigh* uno mek me tyad inuh….Why do we have brilliant, articulate women defending dastardly crimes committed by men in power???? WHY? WHY? WHY? How can you rally behind leaders who have proven that they are corrupt and self serving and misogynistic? I mean, it just defies logic! Why would you put your head on the block for people who don’t even respect your gender?????And that by the way, is the LEAST of their offences. What about the bastards who pay rapists to terrorize and threaten women who dare to raise their voices? HOW CAN YOU STAND BEHIND THEM??????? What about the bastards who take the bread out of your mouth because you choose to oppose, instead of condone??? How about the ones who give preferential treatment to their own children or children of their lackeys and give them scholarships and positions you or your children worked for and deserved??? How about the ones who steal your land and give it to someone else? How about the ones who bribe magistrates to get their sons out of serving jail time while you can’t get justice for crimes committed against you? The police doesn’t even want to take your statement? DON’T MUDDAHFUKIN TELL ME IT’S IN THE PAST! Da snake only shed ih skin! Da still a snake, poisonous as evah. And we the people, don’t forget, can’t forget.  Some of us NEVER recover.

You call upon us to serve. You call us apathetic. You call us lazy. BUT YOU ASK YOURSELF: how many good people have you squooshed in the dirt, broken and devastated, having lost everything; and, then you kicked them when they were down, after they just lost everything standing behind you, for you and with you????

Sad truth is: if you can’t kill your roots of evil and corruption…you will grow the same weeds, long and tendrilous, choking off any possible growth and progress. We can’t be for you when you are for them. Period. We want to. We might admire some of our new politicians. You love Belize. You are dedicated and passionate. But you lose every ounce of credibility when you excuse obscenely unethical and straight up thuggish behaviour. We appeal to you. We need people to vote for and right now, we can’t trust anybody. Please give us a reason to believe. Perhaps, if you kicked out your criminals; prosecute a few; make reparations by returning stolen property and giving the deserving their hard earned scholarships and jobs; make solid plans instead of quick fix band aids…and maybe, just maybe, if you start listening to your people, we might start believing.

Don’t you understand we are afraid of you? Don’t you understand we are ashamed of you? Don’t you understand that we are paralyzed by your intimidation and condescending ways? And most of all, don’t you understand YOU WORK FOR US? WE PAY YOUR SALARY. YOU OWE US YOUR RESPECT AND CONSIDERATION. DO NOT TALK DOWN TO US. DO NOT INSULT US WITH YOUR ARROGANCE AND CAVALIER DISMISSAL. You keep pushing a people who are very close to having nothing to lose. You are asking for anarchy. People can only take so much. And while Belizeans seem to be extremely resilient and accommodating of their own rape, we do have a breaking point. Don’t find out where that is.