I noticed something that was very concerning and disheartening when I was in Belize. No matter what it was, the answer was “I don’t think so.” or “No.”  It was never: “Lemme see what I can do about that for you.” or “No problem mam. It’ll just be a minute.”

Preparing for the funeral:

A “Can we sing a song right here after this?”

B “No. We are only allowed to sing 4 songs through the whole service.”

Who the hell gets to say how one says goodbye to a loved one???? But ok.

Preparing for the Repast:

A “How many people are we preparing food for, Aunt Stephanie (my mom)?”

B “About half the people who come to the funeral won’t be able to make it because they have to travel. So between 300 and 400 at least, because I m sure some of Henry’s friends will like to be there. ”

A “Well, I nevah mi di plan fi feed no lottah Kerob!” And with that, people put back their turkeys in their freezers.

WOW!!! ARE YOU FN KIDDING ME????? WHo The HelL GetS tO DeCiDe WHO getS to GRIEVE a PeRsON????? So instead of having our extended family prepare the food as we all have for each other over the years, my family and I had the repast catered 🙂 F U Bitches!

Ordering food at a well known restaurant in Belmopan:

A “I would love to have the ceviche.”

B “I’m sorry mam but we just run out of conchs.”

A “Ok…what about today’s special?”

B “We just serve our last stew beans and rice; we only have rice and beans.”

A “Ok…I’ll have that then.”

B “I’m sorry mam but we run out the rice and beans.”

A “Ok…how about a bacon and cheese sandwich?’

B “Yes, mam.”

C “I’ll have the bacon cheeseburger,” says my companion.

B “Im sorry mam but we dont have bacon.”

A  “So that means you can’t make my bacon cheese sandwich right?”

B  “Yes mam.”

A “Ok but if you knew that already, why did you take my order just now? Fine. DO YOU HAVE BREAD AND BUTTER?”

And the list goes on really…it was like every time there was an issue, I had to be the one to find my own solutions even though I was PAYING someone else for a service. You should have seen the confused looks on people’s faces…

Well…some people or maybe a lot of people would want me to accept: “da just Belize mein”.

Na ah.

See the problem is, we are a tourist destination. People are coming here expecting to live out a fantasy and they are paying you fabulous money to do what is just basic services like HAVE THE FOOD YOU GOT ON YOUR MENU AVAILABLE. Sheesh! We need to realize that people have choices. If we don’t meet even a mediocre standard, they will not come back and they won’t send their friends here. There is only so much our natural beauty will do for us. They will go to other places like the Dominican Republic where everything is cheaper and they can get whatever they ask for. Shit! I might have to go to the Dominican Republic so I can get a real vacation…it’s not like I said this is a “working vacation”! DO YO JOB

The other thing: We want our economy to get a heartbeat right? We want investors right? Well but seriously…what website do we go to? What office? It is ridiculous trying to do research on Belize. You have to be one determined mo fo if you are going to try to do business in Belize. NOTHING IS COORDINATED! It screams unprofessional, inefficient and just flat out “too much trouble”.

For the above reasons, for many years I didn’t talk too much about Belize because I seriously did not want to be sending people there and then end up embarrassin my damn self…den dey be mad at me cause dey spent all kindsa money and had a lousy time or whatever..before you know it, I don lost a friend.

Please people. Get your ish together. You have to NETWORK and COOPERATE with each other. You want progress? You have to be a part of it. Start THINKING. Start PLANNING. COmMit. Maybe if dey mi gaat 2 dawnkey, this nevah miya happen